so very tired

I am the kind of tired 

That no amount of sleep can fix. 

The fear of fucking up and being a vegetable or other sort of burden, combined with a fear of pain are the only reasons I'm still here now. 

I don't want to be here anymore. 

I don't want to be here anymore. 

I don't want to be here anymore. 

I don't want to be here anymore. 

I don't want to be here anymore. 

I don't want to be here anymore. 

I don't want to be here anymore. 

I don't want to be here anymore. 

I don't want to be here anymore. 

I don't want to be here anymore. 

I don't want to be here anymore. 

I don't want to be here anymore. 

I wish I could get past my fears and fucking end it.